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April marks Stress Awareness Month, but for many working mothers, stress is not limited to a single month; it’s a daily reality.
A recent Gallup poll found that more than half of working moms report feeling stressed most of the day as they juggle careers, childcare and household responsibilities. Director of Behavioral Health at Kaiser Permanente Redwood City, Nicole Ibarra, LMFT, offered some tips for navigating the tug-of-war between professional and personal life.
“Working moms often feel like they’re not doing enough at work or at home,” Ibarra said. “But you can’t be everything to everyone.”
Women are more likely than men to handle personal or family responsibilities during the workday, and to continue job duties after hours, the poll showed.
“They’re often the first call from schools, the ones scheduling appointments, managing logistics on top of working full-time,” Ibarra said of working moms.
In the days of social media, guilt, self-doubt and the pressure to “do it all” have only intensified with more avenues for self-comparison, Ibarra said.
“We’re often seeing people’s best moments online,” Ibarra said. “That can create this illusion that everything is easy and perfect, which leads to feelings like, ‘Why can’t I keep up?’”
The behavioral health director encourages working moms to focus on practical, sustainable habits, like carving out small windows of personal time.
“I start my day with something for myself, and I end my day the same way,” she said. “Even 20 to 30 minutes, whether it’s exercise, reading or just quiet time, can make a big difference.”
She also recommends reevaluating packed schedules, especially when it comes to children’s activities.
“There was a time when I had my kids involved in way too many extracurricular activities, and it just wasn’t manageable,” Ibarra said. “I think we really want to look at what our kids are interested in.”
The behavioral health director also recommends prioritizing essential tasks, focusing on one task at a time to avoid feeling overwhelmed, and setting clear boundaries between work and home life. Building a support system that can help with carpool and childcare could be another big help.
While day-to-day stress is common, Ibarra said it’s important to recognize when it escalates into something more serious.
“If stress starts impacting your functioning: your sleep, your mood, your ability to get through the day, that’s when it’s time to reach out,” she said of seeking help, such as through therapy.
For many mothers, taking time for themselves can feel indulgent, or even selfish, Ibarra said. However, if moms do not, “eventually we break down,” which can impact the whole family. Ibarra compared personal care to car maintenance — neglect may not show immediate consequences, but over time, the damage builds.
Modeling self-care, she added, can also benefit children.
“When kids see their parents taking care of themselves, they learn that it’s important,” she said. “The goal isn’t perfection… it’s finding small ways to make life feel more manageable.”



